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The Prosecution: Beth

At times I'm recorded while I’m eating. I’ll see myself on her Instagram – it’s like a sudden shock.

A close companion of a decade, she, labels herself the “content queen”. It can be amusing for a short while, but it strains our friendship.

Being highly outgoing, she feels the need to record everything constantly. During meals out, she says, “The phone eats first,” and snaps pictures with bright lighting, which makes me cringe. It's unpleasant when other people see her performing for the camera – I experience secondhand embarrassment. It also frustrates me because meals lose their warmth.

She isn’t exactly an online personality yet, but she is aspiring to become one. She creates vlogs about living in our city, her daily routine, and her work as a stylist. Her content is good, I’ll give her that, but I don’t want to be dragged into it. On occasion I'm captured while dining, or simply tagging along. Later, I appear on her feed later, and it pops up like a jumpscare: I might be no makeup on, an awkward face or be captured mid-bite. It feels invasive.

She also anticipates that I will to record her at inopportune moments. Sometimes I’ll be talking to another person, or we're simply hanging out in the street. The dynamic feels like our bond has transformed into me serving as her unpaid videographer. She could easily hire someone if she wanted high-quality content. When I brought up my unease about this arrangement, she dismissed it. She’s taken me to several brand events, which was nice, but that doesn't compensate for all the energy I spend helping her create material.

I’m grateful that Marielle has supported me with my design career, but I resist our connection to become merely a tally of favours. I don’t feel she's insincere or inauthentic, but at times I feel that if the camera is out, we will begin acting in a way that makes us look good for her channel.

Her directive is, “Alright, smile for the camera!” and film me laughing with another. It feels forced. I need her to recognize that our decade-long friendship still has boundaries. I enjoy being with her, but I also desire to experience it without being filmed, edited, or posted for an audience. I am not a accessory for her online persona.

The Other Side: Marielle

I hope my friend to see that the creations we produce together can get us an opportunity.

I love shooting content. It’s not just a hobby; it’s part of who I am. Producing content and sharing my life online allows me to express myself and engage with people in new ways.

I don’t see myself as a full influencer yet, but it's savvy to generate income from your passions. I look up to people on social platforms who pull off that aesthetic of informal, self-made film-making.

Content creation is my interpretation of engaging with life: noticing the details, posting them with an viewership that values the art behind it. I never intend to make my friend uncomfortable. Bringing her to industry events was my method of offering access, giving her a opportunity to experience exclusive moments that could help her career in design too. That’s not leverage, it's simply being pragmatic.

I’d still take her to these events even if she didn’t help me, but I desire her to see what the work we make together can achieve: a foot in the door. I know not everyone enjoys being on camera, but often spontaneity is what makes material genuine. Appearing on video occasionally is part and parcel of being my companion. I would delete anything she asked, but she has never asked yet.

I don't demand anybody to be my personal videographer, but companions support one another in minor capacities. My assumption was filming a clip now and then would be fun for Beth. Innovation flourishes in collaboration, and having Beth around makes projects energetic and enjoyable. I don't compel her to take part in anything, and I would never intentionally humiliate her. But creating content jointly occasionally is part of how I record our time together.

I cherish our friendship profoundly and don’t want making videos to drive a wedge between us. I’m willing to compromise: like requesting permission before recording, and steering clear of angles that might make her self-conscious.

This isn’t about power, it’s about expressing my perspective while still respecting hers. Clearly content creation is not a substitute for real connection: it’s just part of how I live my life and I desire her to be involved in a way that’s agreeable for both of us.

Outside Perspectives: Public Sentiment

Is it right for her to stop recording herself and her friend when they are out together?

There’s nothing more uncomfortable than having a friend film you. I get that it’s Marielle’s job, but I don’t make friends come to my work. Maybe she can find like-minded creators to create content with. With the uncertain future of technology, personal relationships are the only thing we have – cherish them!
Liberty, 25

When pursuing something as a career, it's unfair to expect your friends for help every time, even if they have done it before. If Marielle loves creating, that doesn’t mean all those around her is content. She must to honor Beth’s personal space.
Another reader, 26

She may enjoy making content and showing off her life publicly, but it isn't for everybody. It was kind she has assisted Beth’s career, but she must to hear what Beth wants.
A commenter, 27

It sounds like you care about each other, so hold on to that and ensure it’s the priority in your relationship. Create some authentic experiences, where true emotions are stored, not digital scrapbooks. Even celebrities who seem to share their worlds actually have more secrecy than it seems.
Sarah, 53

Marielle appears to be not fully engaged nor genuine when they're together – she's on the job. Each appears confused as to what’s reasonable. The solution is not found in trying to alter one another, but in each setting clear limits around what is comfortable to them and seeing if there is an mutually agreeable compromise.
A final view, 71

Now You Be the Judge

In an online poll: is Marielle exploiting their friendship?